Every single day I wait for evening to play, but...

I have a nice work. I obviously know what to do and I am alone here. Lot's of time to think about things. And what do I think about to entertain me in a workday? Roleplaying of course!

So, every day I have ideas and urge to play but when evening comes I am too tired. Six months ago I played almost every night, I just had energy for that. Maybe it's winter and darkness, but I am out of stamina when the evening and possible time to play comes.

It's frustrating. Now (at my lunch hour) I am so full of ideas and excitement, that I'd want to play right now. Currently I am waiting for an evening so I am at home and can start to play (like every darn day) but when that time comes, I just want to plug some movie on and go to bed.

Frustrating. Another thing is, that I have all these ideas and inspiration for writing stuff when I am at work, but in the evening I am too tired to write anything down anymore.

I have no idea how six months ago I had stamina to play almost every evening. Maybe it was because it was lighter outside? Cant wait for spring and that sweet recharge from sun.

But now, what would I want to do?

• Write my YDIN basic rules so I can fully start to develope all the cool stuff I want to
• Play YDIN while I develope it (playing and later writing down ideas I got from gamemastering)
• Play Vampire: the Masquerade what I am currently running
• DM occasionally D&D, it's fun and "relaxing" after serious rpg
• Finish current V:tM chronicle to try out other games
• Run CoC 20's adventure I have in my mind
• More YDIN writing and playing

Somehow it's just easier to play PC or gaming console a while, then go to bed and start a movie. I was thinking, that the energy I use on PC or console games could I use it in roleplaying games? But there's a difference.

Obviously gaming with PC or console is different thing. You just need to sit there and push buttons and be silent and watch the screen. In roleplaying you have to use your grey mass and interact and be creative.

I could though leave the movies and get some nice series to watch before sleeping. That way I don't have to spend 1,5 - 2 hours before sleep, but 20 minutes (if anime ;) ) so I could have more time to be "awake". Maybe I'll do that. Get some anime with kazillion episodes every 20 minutes long so I can have an excuse to rpg the saved time?

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Damn, I want to play so bad now!